Everyone wants to be good at sex. But sometimes, it can be hard to assess if what you’re doing is right. The human anatomy is fairly complex, and every one is unique. Techniques that may work for one person may not work for someone else. The prospect of fingering your partner can be even more nerve-wracking, especially if you don’t know what you’re doing. This article provides some tips on how to finger your partner like a pro!
#1. Clip your nails and clean your hands
When fingering your partner, you must use clean hands with closely-clipped nails. The genitals can be delicate and sharp nails can lead to fissures or cuts. You don’t want to risk potentially scraping your partner’s insides during an intimate moment. You should also clean your hands thoroughly to prevent germs from spreading inside. Beyond issues of safety, no one likes the idea of having dirty fingers and nails poking and prodding their insides.
#2. Take your time to raise the temperature
Don’t be in a rush to go downtown quickly. Take your time. Start by exploring your partner’s erogenous zones, i.e., the parts of their body that are extremely sensitive to touch. Everyone has different erogenous zones, but some of the most common are the underarms, thighs, nipples, neck, and, of course, the lips. You can try kissing their erogenous zones and trail your fingers up and down their bodies, getting them excited about the eventual stimulation.
In addition to exploring your partner’s erogenous zones, you can also try other ways to build anticipation. If you’re feeling adventurous, you can perform a striptease to get your partner excited. You can even enact your partner’s sexual fantasies and desires, such as foot fetishism, voyeurism, neck fetishism, etc. Everyone has different sexual desires and fantasies, so tapping into them can be an excellent way to build anticipation before you start fingering.
#3. Explore the clitoris, the seat of female pleasure
The clitoris is the seat of pleasure in the female anatomy. The clitoris is full of thousands of nerve endings that can induce full-bodied orgasms and sensual pleasure. The entire clitoral structure is pretty deep, but the visible part of the clitoris is a small knob above the vagina. When you start penetrating your partner’s genitals, focus on the clitoral tip. You can try different fingering techniques around the clitoris until you find a technique that produces the best results.
#4. Explore the anal opening gently
Fingering isn’t only about exploring the vagina and the clitoris. You can also explore your partner’s anus to induce amazing orgasms. Whether your partner is female or male, anal stimulation can certainly get them revved up. After all, the anus has a high concentration of nerve fibers that can deliver intense sexual stimulation. But if your partner isn’t used to anal stimulation, you may need to go really slow and gently.
You can start by moving your fingers around the anus. Feel the way the anal muscles clench and twitch in response to your fingers. You can also swipe across the anus and slowly insert the tip of your finger. You need to be slow and patient with anal fingering. If your partner feels any discomfort, hold back, take a break, and then start again later. You must also use lots of lubrication for anal fingering because the anus doesn’t produce lubrication of its own.
#5. Use lots of lubrication before fingering
Lubrication is your friend. The vaginal opening can produce natural lubrication because of sexual arousal, but the anus can’t. And even vulva-owners may occasionally suffer from insufficient lubrication because of numerous underlying factors, such as menopause, hormonal changes, and more. Whether you’re fingering your partner’s vagina or anus, it’s a good idea to use a water-based lubricant. The lubricant can allow you to slide your fingers inside without any friction or discomfort, making the entire process more pleasurable.
#6. Ask your partner what they like
Some people believe communication during sex can be awkward. But that’s not true. Actively communicating during sex and asking for your partner’s input shows how much you care. It can also make your partner feel comfortable about sharing tips on what they want, which can improve your fingering skills. Ask your partner what they like and want, ask them to guide you through the fingering process, and communicate openly throughout the sexual experience.
#7. Seek assistance from your sex toys
Fingers are great, but you can take the experience even further with some sex. Numerous studies have shown that sex toys are excellent for masturbation and mental health. And sex toys are often designed for specific purposes, which means they’re sometimes even more reliable at inducing orgasms than fingers! If you want to stimulate your partner’s entire clitoral structure and not just the clitoral tip, you can use the 2-in-1 vibrator and clitoral sucker, Namii. This sex toy delivers pulses of sonic waves to stimulate the clitoris and ensure orgasms!
#8. Try different fingering techniques — not just one
Fingering your partner, with or without a sex toy, involves lots of trial and error. Instead of simply pushing your finger in and out, try different techniques. You can try spelling the alphabet with your fingers, move your fingers as if you were writing a letter, or even move your fingers in a “come hither” motion. The “come hither” motion is particularly good for anal stimulation because it allows you to reach the prostate gland in males, which can lead to amazing orgasms.
There is no right or best way to finger your partner. The most important aspects of fingering your partner are consent, constant communication, and the willingness to experiment within your individual levels of comfort. Remember, practice makes perfect, so every time you finger your partner, you’ll get closer to fingering them like a pro!
